my name is caitie
setheverman:
“emerald-imperial:
“please look at my cat’s feet
”
ankle tattoos? lol what a hipster
”

setheverman:

emerald-imperial:

please look at my cat’s feet

ankle tattoos? lol what a hipster

kvothe-kingkiller:

violent-darts:

the-desolated-quill:

anal-sneeze:

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?”

The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound.

The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”

The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way.

Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery.

The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.

The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”

The man says, “All right, all right. I’m *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?”

The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.”

The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.”

The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.”

The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.”

The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?”

The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.

Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone.

The man demands the key to the stone door.

The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby.

He demands another key from the monks, who provide it.

Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire.

So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst.

Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.”

The man is relieved to no end.

He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.

But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk

image

Originally posted by disneyasastrology

BWAHAHAHAHAH. 

the way i learned this, it was always told through spoken word. And you’d do the door thing for ages. AGES. literally just making up any old material. ‘behind the foam door is a door made of spinach’ that kind of shit. Go on until whoever is listening has already begged you to stop and has now gone on to pleading, clutching your shirt on their knees pleading. And when you finally said the last line? People went fucking nuts Like there was a good chance of just getting the teeth knocked out of you after telling that joke.

A friend of mine did that shit for 30 minutes on a camp once. The entire fucking bus just exploded in anger when she finished. It was a fucking massacre. 

just-shower-thoughts:

Falling asleep as a passenger on a road trip is almost the equivalent of fast traveling in video games

c-bassmeow:

batmanisagatewaydrug:

reblog if you’ve ever been horrified by your own Customer Service voice

she is so FAKE 

just-shower-thoughts:

Instead of colorizing photos, in 50 years we will be removing filters.

fukkkres:

safety boy tell ‘em

nickholmes:
“ “We never just talk anymore.” ”

nickholmes:

“We never just talk anymore.”

amelia-pond-inthe-tardis:

“did you bring protection?”
“don’t worry babe”
*pours salt in a circle around bed*

unclefather:
“grind
”

unclefather:

grind

uss-assbutt:

austriea:

man you know what I want? a superhero series where they have powers that 100% contradict their personalities. a fishermans daughter who lives by the sea, swims every day, learns that she can control fire. a boy who’s mortified of heights but realizes he can use antigravity and hates it. someone who was bitten by a dog as a child, suffers extreme fear around animals, can now communicate with them. they’re all disgusted by their powers.

yes good but what about the ~character development~ as they learn to cope with their powers and overcome their fears

the pyrokinetic swimmer wading out into the ocean armed with waterproof matches to practice so nothing goes wrong, building her confidence with the sea as her safety net, being so proud when she figures out how to heat the air just enough that she dries off instantly after swimming

the boy slowly overcoming his fear of heights, realizing that he can catch himself if he ever falls, standing swaying on top of playground sets and closing his eyes as he tries to safely hover down (and not fall on his face again)

the girl’s terror lessening as the previously terrifying cacophony of the dogs at the park turns into a chorus of “ball! ball! throw me the ball!” “it’s me! I’m the good boy!” and “squirrel!!!” and learning to communicate back, have them listen to her, learning how to calm down a dog who’s overexcited to the point of biting, discovering that the scary dog down the street is just home alone a lot and lonely, staring her fear in the face and learning its secrets

because being disgusted with their powers is interesting, but I want to see people learning to love even the scary and contradictory parts of themselves

kvothe-kingkiller:

violent-darts:

the-desolated-quill:

anal-sneeze:

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?”

The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound.

The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”

The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way.

Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery.

The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier.

The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.”

The man says, “All right, all right. I’m *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?”

The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.”

The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.”

The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.”

The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.”

The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?”

The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.

Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone.

The man demands the key to the stone door.

The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby.

He demands another key from the monks, who provide it.

Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire.

So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst.

Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.”

The man is relieved to no end.

He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound.

But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk

image

Originally posted by disneyasastrology

BWAHAHAHAHAH. 

the way i learned this, it was always told through spoken word. And you’d do the door thing for ages. AGES. literally just making up any old material. ‘behind the foam door is a door made of spinach’ that kind of shit. Go on until whoever is listening has already begged you to stop and has now gone on to pleading, clutching your shirt on their knees pleading. And when you finally said the last line? People went fucking nuts Like there was a good chance of just getting the teeth knocked out of you after telling that joke.

A friend of mine did that shit for 30 minutes on a camp once. The entire fucking bus just exploded in anger when she finished. It was a fucking massacre. 

am-eric-an:
“ gnostic-forest:
“ charlottegreen:
“ i’m so in love with this. i can’t even. ah. my favourite feeling in the world is putting your head beneath the water and entering an entirely different place, so peaceful, so quiet. what i miss more...

am-eric-an:

gnostic-forest:

charlottegreen:

i’m so in love with this. i can’t even. ah. my favourite feeling in the world is putting your head beneath the water and entering an entirely different place, so peaceful, so quiet. what i miss more than anything when i’m living away from the ocean is being able to duck under and leave all my worries on the surface.

This is extraordinary

not only that, but they say only about 5% of ocean depths have been observed. And around 70% of Earth is covered by water. I just think that’s mind-blowing.